Scoop or Stab? Lick or Bite?

I'm talking food here, people.  Consuming techniques.
Salads:  I love salads.  I make them often here but I also order them frequently while dining out.  I prefer using my fork to stab the goodies but that can take forever.  You can't really "load up" with the stab.  Or it can also result in too much at the end of the fork and then you either go for it causing your cheeks to expand like a chipmunk packing it in for winter or delicately pick off some tasties to make it more socially acceptable.
So if you're not a stabber then you become a scooper.  If, indeed, you decide to go in that direction then your balancing skills have to equal Nick Wallenda's.  You know, the Flying Wallendas.  The tightrope walking family.  Did you see him cross Niagara Falls last week?  No?
Back to the balancing act.  If there's too much on your fork while you're into the scooping action, you know for sure a cherry tomato will end up in your lap - covered in Ranch dressing.  Schmear!   If you decide to be conservative while scooping, you're there past midnight. 
Ice cream:  I also love ice cream.  I believe I love it more than salads.  Big surprise, eh?  I'm a hand-dipped kinda gal; Petey is keen on soft-serve.  I used to be a "biter."  I like to chew my ice cream.  I'm a masticater.  That's not a vulgar word - look it up. hehe  I stopped getting my ice cream in a cone several years ago; I like using a spoon so I'm not sure I can refer to myself as a "biter" anymore although I'm still chewing.
Soft-serve people have to be lickers whether their sweets are in a cone or a cup.  Ok, maybe not the cup but you know they're not chewing the ice cream if it's soft-serve from a cup. 
Hey, maybe I've discovered a shared category with salads!  Maybe those soft-serve people that use spoons are SCOOPERS too.
So - let's count heads, eh?  Who's a scooper?  Who stabs?  Any lickers in the house?  Biters?
Weigh in, folks, this is important.