Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Winter tips

Having lived up north for all but three years of my life, I have a few tips for you.  I'm sure most of you already know them so feel free to add your own.

Mostly I'm writing this blog for the poor unsuspecting suckers who take a wrong turn and end up here between November and April.

First off - don't eat the yellow snow. hahaha  Everybody knows that one, right?

No matter how many "double dog dares" you get, don't put your tongue on a cold metal pole.  Not that I ever did that but I hear tell it hurts like hell.

Mittens are much warmer than gloves.

It's very difficult to look chic and be warm at the same time.  Go for warm.  Every . . . single . . . time.

While walking across a very icy area, take baby steps.  Yes, you'll look like 102 old woman but it's better than having your feet slip right out from under you.  Landing on your butt hurts almost as bad as trying to un-stick your tongue from that cold pole I was telling you about.

Always, always keep your pockets stocked with tissue.  There is simply nothing grosser than frozen boogers.  

Make sure you remove your balaclava before going into the bank.

Ice melt crystals are expensive but they will help you dodge a law suit from your mail carrier.

That's all I have for you.  Feel free to post your warnings (tips).


  1. Don't watch your dad knock ice sickles(sp.) off the roof ,while standing under the ladder.jim

  2. My neighbor across the street (dead now but in her 80s back then) ended up with a huge shiner when she was knocking those suckers off.

    1. I've got a scar on my head to remember it by.Jim